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Shufflingdead > Articles > Dating
Picking Up Ladies at Work Doesn't Work
 | Cheerleaders won't fuck webmasters. |
I have determined the secret of picking up women. The key is to target the correct audience. Basically, you want to go for girls who are just a little bit behind you age wise, wealth wise and skill wise. You also have to go for girls who actually have some kind of interest in you, sometimes they just dig certain guys.
Like most guys, most girls are shallow as fuck. Quite typically a guy will fall for a girl just looking at her, won't worry at all about personality. Obviously, some guys are less shallow then others, and will get to know less attractive girls and actually date said girls. The ladies are much the same way, they'll date poorer guys, but initially money and power are the things that draw them in. The initial attraction for a potential mate is by far the most important thing. That's why you have to be goddamn smooth as hell if a girl finds out you aren't Mr. Moneybags to actually be attractive to her.
Let's look at an example here. There's this lowly video store clerk. In his spare time he builds armor and plays video games. He has a friend who works with him, in his spare time he runs a website and plays video games. These two wind up with a little power in the work place, but it's the guy building the armor who's put in charge of hiring. He goes out and hires a young lady, a cheerleader. This cheerleader almost immediately starts getting hit on by the webmaster. For some inexplicable reason she turns down this intelligent, funny and likable young man. Quickly, she, the webmaster and the blacksmith become friends. Eventually she'll start screwing the blacksmith. That's because the blacksmith has more power, and more manly skills than the ingenious (and did I mention handsome) webmaster. Now, this on its own isn't a lot of proof, let's see what happens next. The blacksmith is still just a video store clerk during the day you see, and she'll quickly tire of this guy. Eventually she'll run off with his other friend, the one with money, a car and a house. Bam! Stolen out from under the video store clerks, the cheerleader is gone, lost for eternity (or maybe just a month) to the forces of money.
Here's another example, explaining the rest of what I'm talking about. Again, we'll use the two video store clerks example. The blacksmith again goes out and hires a young lady. This time though, she is precisely the kind of girl the webmaster finds attractive. I mean she has glasses, she's sarcastic, she wears a lot of black, exactly the kind of girl the webmaster becomes infatuated with. At first he attempts to act slightly normal towards her, but quickly stumbles into his same old mistakes. He thinks he's being funny by using what are obviously not serious pick up lines on her, he brings out some of the quirkier bits of his personality. She just doesn't take enough interest in him to realize what he's doing though. Instead of participating in his weird little in-jokes, she just finds him what they call "creepy." Don't ask me why this happens, there isn't actually an answer, women are fucking crazy. Maybe it does boil down to him just not being rich enough, maybe he's not muscley enough, maybe she's just afraid of guys who have the periodic table on their bedroom wall.
 | Girls with glasses will also not fuck webmasters. |
With this new found information, there are a few routes a lonely and horny guy can take. If you want more girls than you can handle, I would say give up on them completely and just start making as much money as possible. Don't think about anything buy money and buying stuff with this money. The ladies will find you irresistible. The less you care about everything but money, the more attractive you become. The problem with this is that some guys are just too lazy to follow through. They want to keep a few hobbies, and cannot make themselves care about money as much as is required.
Here is where the next strategy comes in. Picking up younger women. Let's say you're about nineteen. Now to girls your age, having your driver's license and a car isn't that big a deal. Chances are, most of them have that stuff too. To a young high school girl though, maybe fifteen or sixteen, that stuff is damned impressive. Go down to the local high school, be an outgoing, pushy jackass with the ladies. They will be practically begging you to take advantage of their young, inexperienced bodies. The problem with this strategy is that some guys have morals. They see a problem with things which could be construed as "taking advantage."
If you aren't willing to do either of these things, then I'd estimate you're pretty much screwed. Here's what you need to remember if this is your fate, and I recommend memorizing this, live by it. It doesn't fucking matter. Don't obsess over girls, don't go out of your way to try to pick up girls who obviously have no interest in you. I know in the movies the ladies will go for the poor, goofy guy who gives them flowers. In real life though, girls call those guys "creepy" and they get restraining orders against them. If you honestly want to keep hammering away on plots to pick up girls your age who have the same amount of money as you, then you are an honorable man. But for the love Miyamoto, just go for the ones who obviously show interest in you. If you think she's actually checking you out, and making attempts at being funny or interesting specifically to you. If she's going out of her way to see you, then you should probably go for it. Otherwise, heed not to these untouchable vixens who wander in and out of your life. You may obsess over them constantly, but you're probably nothing but a face and a name to them. Life is too short to worry about all the chicks you'll never screw.
Well there it is. That's how you get women, and alternatively, how you do the honorable thing and don't get women.
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