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Shufflingdead > Articles > Dating
Dating is for Suckers
Warning: The following will likely offend anyone dating a foreign female. Mr. Quaid may not hit me for anything I am about to say.
It has been a long time since I thought about this thing called dating. I suppose it isn't as evil as I once thought. In the recent past I went on what a select few might call a "date." I just call it hanging out with a female who just happens to have the instinct to bowl overhanded. I have devised not one but two new strategies for this wretched "game."
Foreign is Good
In every school in every city in the world there is a select group of people. The transfer students. These "foreigners" are not only a highly selective cult, they are a gold mine for anyone looking to find a breeding partner.
When going out on a social activity with one of these other worldly humans, there are a few things to remember. The first thing is, they are not of your country, therefore superior. Be sure to select an activity that your potential ladyfriend is capable of participating in, sex doesn't count. One should never be afraid to strike up a conversation with a person of another nation. You see, unlike the miserable whores who you've been chasing after for the past two years, foreign females are not only nice but, not whores!
No matter how funny or "cute" you think you might have been on your date, there is no possible way for this strategy to actually work. After all, I tried it and failed. Don't forget, if I can't do it, nobody can. Except for the one and possibly two guys I know who it has worked for.
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