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Shufflingdead > Articles > Fun
Looking for a Good Time?
I know you are! I bet you're wondering how to have fun since it is quite obvious you don't know how. Chances are, making out with your girlfriend in a poorly lit room or getting drunk/high is how you define "fun". Well I've got news for you, fun is actually nothing like those things.
Fun is going to your local shopping centre with a few friends, and buying $8 Halloween hats. The purchased hats may include several features; funky colours, jingle bells, and anything else that would get you called a "fag". These magical caps grant you powers of extroverts and daring. There is a code of conduct for wearing such hats, here's that:
- Drive around to every public place in your town until everyone has seen your hat
- Scream "hottiex0r" at every mildly attractive female you come across
- Show off your giant tongue to every girl how dares make eye contact with you
- Have sex*
*no one has ever fulfilled this rule
All driving done whilst having "fun" must be in a 25 year old boat of a car. The car must have problems starting, turning and especially breaking. In fact, it is preferred the car have no breaks whatsoever, instead, just use a tree to stop, that's what they're there for. If at all possible, have an ub3r sound system installed in the car so everyone may enjoy the same disco/pop/rap music you do.
If there is ever a lull in the action, stop by all of your friends houses and see if they want to "cruise" with you. If you find any of your friends drunk/high or having sex, don't let them come with you, you're obviously too cool for them. If there is any other way to have fun
fill me in.
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