Near the end of every year people all over the planet gather together to celebrate some guy's birthday. In my part of the world, we gather together near the end of the year to celebrate the release of the newest Lord of the Rings movie. Sadly, this will be the last year we do, as this year the final installment of the trilogy, Return of the King, has been released. Here follows the account of the drunkening, watching Return of the King and the finding of the cock ring of power.
The Fellowship of the Beer
To kick the whole event off Weskimo, DMUSER and myself decided we should all get drunk and stay up the whole night performing the nerdiest of activities.
When we arrived at Weskimo's house we were greeted with the old chap already pumped about the homo-erotic activities he expected would soon commence.
The beer was popped open and we began celebrating our grand expectations of the film.
Much to Weskimo's dismay, no homo-erotic activities took place. We did, however, do a lot of really nerdy things such as play Magic.
This is Newbs, also known as me, not feeling any effects of alcohol at all, seriously guys.
Weskimo quickly succumb to the beer's wicked effects.
DMUSER began rocking out and partying hard at the thought of watching Return of the King, just hours away.
We set a watch, got a fire going and camped out in Weskimo's house for a few hours to save our strength for the grand orgasms we all expected to be experiencing soon.
The Two Extended Editions
Continuing with our parties campaign to celebrate Return of the King, we spent the following morning and afternoon watching the extended editions of the first two movies, Fellowship of the Ring, and The Two Towers.
The next morning we awoke feeling fully rested from our three hours sleep.
Weskimo felt down right perky.
The rest of our troop arrived, here's "Jon" and Limey, quite excited to watch three movies in one day.
apocalyptic_girl came too.
DMUSER and I were shocked and awed all over again by the epic grandeur of the films.
apocalyptic_girl fantasized about Arwen while watching the movies.
Limey fantasized about Wargs and Oliphaunts while watching the movies.
The Return of the Cock Ring
Eventually we finished watching the first two movies, and it was time to head to the theatre.
Before we could leave DMUSER needed to dawn his armor and take over The Shire.
Limey tried to defend his homeland.
Thought he could break DMUSER's hold over the land.
Turned out DMUSER was a superior warrior though.
In a last desperate attempt Weskimo discovered DMUSER's weakness and successfully scoured The Shire. This mighty blow to DMUSER not only won back our homeland, but it knocked loose DMUSER's cock ring of power. Wow.
Appendices
As soon as DMUSER was defeated we all went to the theatre and viewed one of the finest movies in cinematic history. To avoid having my precious stolen by mall security, I left the camera in the car for our glorious three hour wait in line.
After having exactly 89 orgasms during my viewing of the film, I was completely exhausted by the outstanding greatness of the movie.
Weskimo approved whole hearted-ly of the movie too. He was glad to be home though, and uttered "Well, I'm back."
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