|
Shufflingdead > E-mails
Newbs' E-mails
Send in advice, complaints, random strings of characters, or whatever. Send me an e-mail. I'll post and respond to it.
E-mail me!
[Somebody who posted in one of my polls]
What is with this obsession you have with placing everyone in a category? Just because you happen are trapped in your own inescapable hell which happens to be that of the little-horny-bastard-who-is-ironically-afraid-of-intimacy-and-as-such-must-talk-
obsessively-about-sex-and-all-things-to do-with-sex-in-a-pathetic-attempt-to-
conceal-his phobia-for-fear-of-being-publicly-mocked-and-shunned-but-
not-before-being-tarred-and-feathered-by-an-angry-mob-of-over-sexed-midget-
punk-whore-posers doesn’t mean you have to drag everyone down with you.
Newbs Response:
So I'm going through my website, updating and fixing code, that sort of thing, and on a whim I check the results of my old polls from way back in the days I was hosted by Angelfire. To my surprise I find someone has left the above comment in the results of the following poll.
What are you?
whore - 36
bastard preppy punk - 7
male nerd - 23
female nerd - 15
I realize it's not exactly an email but I've decided it's close enough and that I enjoy responding to personal attacks so much I couldn't possibly pass it up. I don't really know when the comment was left, and I HAVE NO IDEA WHO LEFT IT, SERIOUSLY GUYS, IT'S A FUCKING MYSTERY!
This email does, admittedly, make some sense. Putting people in categories has been something of a feature of this website in the past, and I am definitely a little horny bastard. Spend a few minutes reading this website and you could figure that out. Those insults are nothing new. What I'd like to know is where the author gets the idea that I have a fear of intimacy. Perhaps it is the author, not me, who has the problem. Maybe trying to direct attention away from his/her own difficulty with intimacy.
Let's find out precisely who the one with the problem is. Dear author, do you think it would be possible for you and I to get together sometime to find who really has the fear of intimacy? I'll tell you what, you email me, we'll figure out how we could meet up and we'll take turns fulfilling each other's most bizarre fantasies. Doesn't matter what you're into, depriving yourself of meat products, turning me into a bitter old man, that's all cool.
[I Hate ANDREW NEWBORN i_hate_andrew_newborn@yahoo.com]
Subject: Merry Christmas Mother Fucker! Date: Sat, 28 Dec 2002 10:09:11 -0800 (PST)
Dearest Newbs,
I trust you had gay bashing, mother fucking, yule tide, fudge packing, pillow biting Christmas.
Why have I not been added to your website recently?? I am hurt newbs. Please Keep in mind that I hate you. Very much. More so now. If that is possible. I hate you.
BTW, I am NOT Yo Mama or the Heckler. I'm a real motha fuckin G!! I have heard from inside sources that you seem to have confused me with the Genius formerly known as the Heckler. AND Genius he is!! {{That poem was GOLD}}
Please keep in mind that we are known as your Fuckin Bounty Hunters!!!
Newbs Response:
Okay "Fuckin Bounty Hunters" I am going to try to say this as simply as possible. Someone who is a "gay basher" is someone who makes fun of gay people. It makes utterly no sense for you to call me a gay basher as it is you using all of these homosexual-offensive phrases such as "fudge packing" and "pillow biting."
Oh, I don’t doubt for a second that you are a "real motha fuckin G." There is no doubt in my mind. Just thought I’d ask though, what precisely is a "real motha fuckin G?" I should very much like to know and you seem like the kind of guy who would have that kind of information.
By the way, yes, I did have a fine yule tide, filled with much food as well as money which I am working on investing in many nerdy purchases.
Discuss something on the forums - E-mail Us
|
