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Shufflingdead > Archives
January 30, 2005
My writing skills take a turn for the Fight Club, pay close attention because it is time for Ascension.
I'm sure you've all been waiting with bated breath since I last updated to find out if I ever did beat Minish Cap. Well here's your answer, I have completed the game, huzzah's all around. Since this is a Zelda game, and since there's a small chance you didn't read my post about it on the forums, I am now able to fit Minish Cap into my ranking of the Zelda games, so here it is:
 | Google image search calls this intense. |
1. Link to the Past
2. Ocarina of Time
3. Wind Waker
4. Minish Cap
5. Majora's Mask
6. Oracle of Ages
7. Oracle of Seasons
Well there you have it, that's some important shit to know if you're planning on writing my biography. There are many other Zelda games, and indeed I do own them all, some day I'll play them through and then those shall be ranked as well. Now that Minish Cap is out of the way, I can finally return to the games I've been trying to play and/or replay for the last millennia or so: Majora's Mask, Legend of Zelda, Resident Evil 0, Metroid Prime[hard] and Metroid Prime 2. It's not that I'm a nerd of immeasurable stature, I just have no attention span and so must switch between games every meal or so.
It would be truly tragic to not fill this space with more blither-blather, so I am compelled to let you all in on a little something, the word of the week. Today's word of the week - intense. Intense is a very useful word as it can be used in place of any insulting comment and be perceived in the best possible way by your listener. I would estimate that intense is the ultimate filler. Everything ever can be described as being intense. It's complimentary, insulting, sarcastic and serious all at once. That folks, is why intense is the first ever word of the week.
January 25, 2005
I dug through some old files of mine and found a comic that I never actually posted. Here it is now. Seems continuity can jump out the fucking window with regards to these things.
A lot of the people running websites these days like to throw up little commentaries about what game they're playing at the moment, what celebrity they're stalking, what they're thinking about life, the Universe and Everything, that sort of thing. Trouble is, this usually gets referred to as a "blog".
Is Penny Arcade a blog? Of course not, it's an online comic strip. It just happens that the guys who run PA like to sometimes wax poetic about the latest developments in the world of gaming, and sometimes the skinny one likes to talk about recently spawning some kind of "hu-man". That raises the question then, if the PA guys can run a comic strip where they get to yammer on about everything and nothing all at once on their front page, then why can't I? But of course I can, and it isn't blogging because I say so.
 | The Minish Cap likes to tell you how to do puzzles he's never seen before. |
Why Newbs, what game have you been playing lately?! I'm glad you asked that, dear Universe, for these days I am playing The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap. It's not every day you get to play through a brand new Zelda game. Unless Madden is your favourite game franchise, you don't get to play a brand new game from your favourite franchise every day either. Thus far, (and I'm very near the end) this thing is simply amazing. The game borrows and expands on elements from all the previous Zelda titles as these games always do. It's as if Link to the Past and Wind Waker got together for some hot, gooey fornication to provide the graphics. There are many examples of gameplay elements evolved from previous Zelda titles as well, even Four Swords. I'm telling you now; Newbs recommends this product for human consumption.
Fair Newbs, are you presently, figuratively speaking, beating off to any celebrities? That is an excellent question, because indeed I am. This is no chick from a band as usual actually; it's a man I like to call "The Captain". Here, read now as I write him an open letter.
Dear William Shatner,
Bill Shatner, you're the goddamn man. It was just this Christmas that I laid my hands and ears upon your brand new CD, Has Been. It's actually the first CD I have ever owned. I think it's a remarkable product, your cover of the song "Common People" makes me jump up and down in a movement vaguely resembling dancing, I usually sing along while doing so also.
It's not just the CD though, Will, you are on TV a good ten times a day. If it's not a rerun of an old Star Trek episodes or a movie, then it's an award show or an ad for Priceline, All-Bran or some other company. Actually, on the topic of All-Bran, I have to heartily thank you for making me aware of this product. I eat a bowl every day, and seeing you staring up at me from the box as I pass it by makes me remember "eat your bran, fuck face!" My all time favourite of your TV endeavors is that Star Trek episode of Futurama. Man, that shit is great.
Willy, would you be interested in being interviewed by shufflingdead.com?
Thank You Billiam,
Sincerely, Newbs
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